Henry's Birth Story {the really long version}

Henry William Stauffer
{6lbs 9oz / 19 ¾ inches} 

{6lbs 9.1ounces}

I am writing this birth story mostly for myself and for others that like to read birth stories in preparation for their own adventure.  I wish there was a way to keep this short and sweet but  24 hours of labor suggest otherwise and frankly, I can be quite wordy. Feel free to skim J Or if you would like the general outline of events according to Gabe... Birth Story {the really short version} 

Friday, Sept. 20^th: Due Day!

I spent Friday at work with many people wondering whether or not they would see me on Monday. I was feeling great, enjoying pregnancy and confident that they would see me the entire next week – at least! Gabe and I spent that evening cooking supper together and cleaning up a bit around the house. Besides getting the baby monitor up and running we also played around with our new camera. We were both pretty tired so we went to bed early knowing that this precious thing called sleep might not be a part of our lives much longer.

Saturday, Sept. 21^st: 1 Day Over

We woke up “early” (8:00amJ) and well rested.  My morning get together with some friends had been cancelled so Gabe surprised me with date plans. He took me for a ride in the bronco, where we stopped for coffee and donuts at our local bakery and then walked around the farmers market. It was one of those beautiful end of summer mornings and without knowing our little one would be arriving in the next 36 hours we someone understood this was one of our last times as a family of two.

After an afternoon with Gabe at the range and me relaxing and getting caught up at home we met some friends out for pizza and ice cream. It was a little strange to be out and about having people ask when I was due and responding with “yesterday, actually!”.  While we were eating I was definitely having contractions but nothing out of the ordinary and simply wrote them off as Braxton-Hicks.  After getting home that night I told Gabe that I wasn't feeling well and wanted to get things cleaned and packed up a bit just in case I went into labor during the night.

I went to bed experiencing contractions but nothing that I couldn’t sleep through…at first J

Sunday, Sept. 22^nd: The start of a very long 24hours

At 1 o’clock Sunday morning the contractions were starting to wake me up so I went out to the couch and tried sleeping through them the best I could still thinking I wonder if they will stick around.  At 4am I woke Gabe up because they were definitely starting to feel more intense and were about 10-15 minutes apart. We decided if this kept up it could be the real deal so we finished up cleaning up around the house and making sure we had everything we would want at the hospital. We decided to forgo our normal 8:00 church knowing full well we would have many curious friends wondering if today was the day. Gabe cooked his usual Sunday morning eggs and I was able to eat in-between the 10 minute contractions.  After breakfast we decided to go for a walk around the neighborhood. We spent about an hour walking, talking, and timing contractions until ultimately I had to pee so it was time to head back into the house. At this time we probably should have headed back out for more walking but I was getting tired and with contractions now about 7-8 minutes apart I wanted to try and take a shower.  By this time it was only 10:30 but I wanted to lie down on the coach and rest a bit. We watched some t.v. although I don’t remember what while Gabe rubbed my feet to distract me during each contraction.  As the next hour and a half went by my contractions went from 7-8 minutes apart to 2-3 minutes apart.  It was around noon when we decided to call our midwife and get some input. 

After talking with Jess it sounded like we should stick around at home for at least another hour. Thus, remembering it was important to eat for energy we ordered Jimmy Johns. For some reason Gabe decided he needed to go pick it up instead of take advantage of their freaky fast delivery.  While he enjoyed his lunch I decided I really wasn’t all that hungry and was only able to handle a few bites of my sandwich.  Although the contractions were becoming more intense they were inconsistently ranging 2-4 minutes apart and lasting anywhere from 45 seconds to 1 minute and a half apart.  Luckily, the Packer game came on at 1:00 and served as a great distraction as we resumed our position on the coach, me laying on my side and Gabe rubbing/squeezing my foot during contractions.  It was just before half time when I started to get anxious and wanted to call my midwife again. Gabe was pretty calm, confident and relaxed about everything at this point and it was starting to bug me. Why wasn’t he more worried or anxious about his wife going into labor?! My contractions were getting closer and more intense!! He wasn’t fazed one bit and kept referring to things we had learned in our 12-week Bradley Method birthing class. Well, that soon changed because around 2:00 I got off the couch to go to the bathroom, yet again, and made a comment about wanting or feeling like I want to push…

That’s all it took, one four letter word – push – and Gabe sprang into action. He had the car loaded and practically pushing me into it within minutes. He went well over his normal driving speed to get us to the hospital by 2:30 only to find out in the triage room that I was dilated to whopping 3cm. Ugh, we were such amateurs!!  Not only had we rushed in too soon but we had called our parents to let them know we were on our way to the hospital – whoops!

Luckily for us, they let us stay and checked us into a room. We aren’t exactly sure why that was. Maybe it was because my contractions were timing close and intense, maybe because my cervix was so thin they could barely feel it or maybe because our little baby was so low that she could practically feel his head when she checked me. Whatever the reason our nurse got a bath started and we settled in for a labor of what we thought would only take a few more hours, 8-9 tops!

This is where things get a little foggy for me so Gabe has verified my story. I labored in the tub for at least an hour. The contractions were a little more bearable and around 5:30 my midwife wanted to know if I would like to be checked. She said she would be back in an hour if I wanted to try some other positions to keep things moving along.   I wasn’t too crazy about getting out but once I climbed out and tried some other birthing positions I started to experience quite a bit of bloody discharge and even some time puking in the toilet – all great signs!  Jess (my midwife) and our nurse came back at 6:30pm and really liked what they saw which made them  quite confident I had made progress and were thinking I was experiencing  the transition phase which could put me at around 7-8 cm. 

It was  6:30pm on Sunday and I was only at 4cm. FOUR CENTIMETERS!!!

After that disappointing news it was time to get back in the tub, things had felt better there. Unfortunately, my contractions were much stronger this time around. I was having lower back pain and throwing up in the little blue bags all at the same time. I was definitely starting to question my no medication decision! I started to talk to Gabe about considering medication but he would have none of it. He wouldn’t even consider or entertain a discussion about medication and was happy to fight it out with me while I labored away in the tub. All I really remember saying is that I wanted to know my options and that I wasn’t going to wait much longer for something to change. I would give him until 7:00 (15 minutes) and then I either wanted medication or to talk to someone about breaking my water. He bargained for an hour but I would have none of it. Luckily, for both of us Jess or our nurse never entered the room until 8:00 so Gabe got his hour and then some.

At that point Jess checked me again and I was only at 5cm; it was going to be a long night! We decided that I really didn’t want medication and the best option to get this process moving before I changed my mind again would be to break my water. Once my water was broken we spent the next hour laboring with the birthing ball and standing and swaying. At 9:30 I had made it to 7-8 cm – progress!

I knew I still had a long ways to go and because I was feeling tired the most comfortable laboring position for me at this point was to rest on the bed. They hooked the fetal and contraction monitor up at this point to monitor things and for the next 2 hours Gabe stood by my side talking me through each contraction while I zoned out focusing on the sound of our little baby’s heartbeat.

By midnight I had made it to 9cm, I was so close yet I couldn’t push until I had made it to 10. I started to get excited about being able to push and when Jess suggested she manually help stretch me to 10, even though it was going to be painful, I was all for it. Around 1:30am while Gabe stood by my side and Jess calmly rocked in the rocking chair, I kept asking if I could start pushing because I wanted to push – I was ready! Jess had to keep calmingly tell me, not yet. Finally, at 2 o’clock on Monday morning there was no wanting to push only I have to push!

Finally the time had come and I was so ready to get this all over with once and for all. Even though it was the worst pain yet I did my best to bear down and push.  After 45 minutes trying out different positions with little progress Jess was starting to get concerned about the baby’s heart rate. She said that it was too low in between the contractions and decided to give me oxygen to help increase it.  We kept at it for another 15 minutes and then Jess was called out to deliver another baby. Before she left she said it would be best if I only pushed every other contraction to give the baby some rest. WORST IDEA YET! Yikes, even though it was difficult to push it was far worse to NOT push. The pain was rough and I kept wanting Jess to come back and talk me through it. The nurse that stayed with us was skilled but not exactly thrilled to be left with a somewhat distressed baby on the verge of delivery!

Around 2:40 after our nurse had made constant pleas to try and get Jess back in the room she decided to call a doctor.  We were not excited about this and were even less excited when he came in the room. He watched me through one contraction and suggested we use the vacuum to get the baby out. He was so unfriendly and not at all reassuring or encouraging that I kept saying I didn’t want to make the decision without talking to Jess. Gabe did a great job stalling and asking lots of questions and pretending he had no idea what this procedure was about. Finally, Jess came back in but the tension and awkward silence in the room led us to believe that she would not be in charge anymore. I asked Jess what she recommended.  She explained that although the baby was fine if I kept on pushing on my own it might take another 1/2hour to an hour… On the other hand the baby was very low and so close to coming out that if we used the vacuum it would probably only take one or two pushes at the most to finish up.  

At 4:00 o’clock am we decided I should go for the latter. Although I don’t regret the decision it did change our birthing experience dramatically. Up until this point our room had been quite calm and peaceful with the lights off and hushed tones in between the exhausting contractions. As soon as we gave the doctor the go ahead bright overhead lights were flipped on, the bed was positioned so I was laying back more and it looked like surgery was about to be performed.  It became quite a traumatic end to an otherwise slow and steady day. It only took 1-2 really long, hard pushes and luckily the vacuum became more of an “assisting” tool rather than a “pulling out the baby” tool. Gabe and Jess worked hard to get me to give it my all and in the end our little boy didn’t have any bruising or cone shape to his head. Once he was out the doctor put him on my chest and reminded Gabe that he got to announce the gender.  At 4:05am on Monday morning our new little boy rested on my chest while Gabe cut the cord.  Henry wasn’t exactly breathing at this point even though the doctor had sucked a lot of the mucus out of his mouth and nose so the nurse lifted him off of me and he instantly started to cry. She gave him a few seconds of oxygen and then put him back on my chest just in time for him to pee : )

Weird the things you remember the most, Henry peeing on my stomach as I held him close. I was still shaking a little but I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. I focused on holding this precious little baby real close and keeping him warm as the doctor pulled out my placenta and then began stitching me up. I don’ t remember the pain from all that and have Henry to thank.  At this point the nurse was about to stick me with Pitocin but I spoke up and asked if it was really necessary. The doctor who we had not been too fond of from the beginning then punched down on my uterus so blood came squirting out and gave us a “what do you think” look.  Honestly, I was mad but it was hard to tell and although I didn’t really want Pitocin we decided it was probably better to take it than to not at this point.

By 4:20am Gabe, Henry and I were alone in the room getting to know each other.  Honestly, at the time, I remember telling Gabe that I didn’t think I could do it all again without medication and that we might have to rethink our strategy for next time.  And now, over 3 weeks later, even though I remember it being the hardest thing I have ever done in my life I know I would have no problem doing it all over again.

The First 24 Hours